Nov 30, 2012

Cataclysmic Death

There are many theories around the 2012 Shift. I’ve been practicing and devoting myself to those aligned with the Winter Solstice birthing us into the Fifth Dimension; an era of time when we move from the state of individual and economic focus, to one based on community collaboration and sustainable living with the Earth. 

It may sound all nice and fluffy, with butterflies and rainbows, and yes, there is some of that along the way, however, this galactic activation portal has its hosts of portal poundings too. Releasing attachments and preoccupations with being comfortable are hard deaths for the ego to be transformed by. Death is explored in many cultures and Rites of Passage, such as Vision Quests and Death Lodges, the 2012 Shift simply takes it to a cosmic level. 

As I deepen my attunement with principles of the 2012 Shift, I find myself exploring the “darker side”. I watched a video on YouTube that talks about the Pole Shift and the cataclysmic events that humans will perish from as a result. This is not the vision I want to hold, however, as I watched the video, I felt charge in my body, and tears form in my eyes. Rather then judge the content of the video as good/bad, wrong/right, I wanted to work with what was coming up for me, and know something deeper. 

So, I started a “Cataclysmic Death Meditation Practice”. For several days I meditated on the apocalyptic visions of 2012. The tales of Revelation; tidal waves wiping out coastlines, volcanos erupting like Vesuvius, killing mankind and animals alike, covering us in ash and returning us to the Earth. In my meditations I saw my friends and loved ones on the West Coast drown in the tidal waves of the ocean. I felt sadness seeing the massive loss of people I love die. Seeing them perish and still hold love in my heart, and still be present in the Witness, without pulling away from sadness or clinging to salvation, was a big shift in my personal evolution. 

Going deeper with my meditations, I see the rockies turning into massive volcanoes, erupting lava and blazing boulders, wiping out all of Colorado, and with it, all the people I know and love. I see me standing in front of the lava flow, with my cat in my arms. I feel fear as the lava rushes towards me. I feel the pain of my cats claws in my skin. I feel the sadness that she and I are going to die. Feeling into all these sensations, and being being present in it all too. Even in my annihilation, as my bones turn to ash, I am present, conscious. In the expiernace of the now. Holey Moley. 

I’ve done Vision Quests and Death Lodges and have explored the theme of death on many levels. Never before have I contemplated death on such a large scale. My devotion to this practice has opened my heart so much, and I have more clarity in this continuous moment of eternity. 

What comes to me through this practice is the admittance and understanding that the Earth is going to take me out one day. That is fact. When and how, is unknown, but it will happen. So what I do between now and then? Years ago I may have said I would quit my job and travel the world in my last month of life, or maybe have some awesome sex, or spend time with loved ones. All these activities sound fine, however, now I know what I want to do between now and then, whenever then is. I want to be conscious; conscious in my body, in my feelings, in my ego, in my fears, in my heart, in my relationships, in my words, in my truth, in my thoughts, in my every experience of now. Whatever activities happen in that space are simply activities, consciousness is where life is. That is how I want to live my life between now and then. 

It’s this experience that I took out with me on the dance floor this week at Rhythm Sanctuary. What a dance! There was a moment on the dance floor, when we were all in trance, and I saw us all dancing at the base of the volcano; us in ecstatic dance and love as it prepared to destroy us. We were all conscious, and alive, and in the moment, no matter what. We were committed to being present for the ride, all of it. 

I had an amazing dance with a woman, who for me, was the erupting volcano. I pulled her to me and fucked the volcano. Those of you that know me, know I do not curse a lot, however, in this context it fits. I fucked the lava. I fucked the spewing rocks. I ravished my annihilation, and in doing so, I came alive. It was orgasmic!! 

We all need death in our life on some level. Death of old paradigms,  death of attachments and preoccupations. However, since many of us are afraid of the “big” death, we fail to attend to the smaller ones in our live that support us in truly living. How can you honor death in your life? What contemplations are scary for your ego, and how can you be present with that pain, and stay open in the conscious heart at the same time? Great exercise to explore as we move into the 1 month countdown towards Winter Solstice. I love you all and am honored to me on this glorious ride with you. Nameste.